Keeping the CEO happy ?

  • I have enjoyed many hobbys over the years, fishing, raceing modified migets, model airplanes and of course model railroading. All of which has  lead to dissagrements with my better half concerning many issues

     

     As with any of argument but it boils down to a few basic topics, of which can get greatley overblown, mostly on account men speak a forien language then women do. We speak blue, they speak pink, were from mars and they venis. The old saying "cant live with them, cant live without, besides living with one sure beats living under a bridge LOL

     

    for instance "your never here"  But honey I have been here all week end. when I first heard that, it felt like I recieved a left hook and walked off to keep from loosing it. I came to this conclusion, I was in the train room ( fill the hobby or personal time here)  by myself. I try to look at things from as many positions as I can, to see where she is comming from, She is there with no one beside her and no one to talk to...IMPO I think they say 25,000 words a day and men perhaps 1500 LOL, she skips subject matter faster then an NHL goalie defending a 5 on 1 power play. feel great being on the same page with her, if only for a fleeting moment, then my eyes glaze over and then I stare, focising at a dot on the wall, then comes the "You never listen to me" and the cycle revolves again.

     

    Guys can sit sholder to shoulder and talk about anything, the ladies have to have face to face eye to eye contact, if not, your not paying attention. Watch your better half when she talks to other people and see if this isnt true, she sits directly accross from her other friend and both will usually prefer a round table so that they are not shoulder to sholder. guys dont always do that. Notice the restaurant counter, only men sit there shoulder to shoulder. When we talk to a guy we dont have to look eye to eye, and dont realize most ladies have to have that eye contact showing you care.

     

    The majority of ladies 1st hobby is chatting and we call it "gossiping", but we call ours "talking shop" LOL. Most men want to fix it, the gals really dont want it fixed all the time but to just talk about it and be valued, IMPO being valued and loved feels the same to her.

     

    So I try to encourage the pride of my life to undertake any hobby or activity she would like, spend time with her holding hands watching a chick flic or out to the movies.

     

    I dont know what works for others but IMPO there has to be a balance, a compromise, filling her needs and mine, not an easy task but is do-able and well worth the effort

     

    The cost of getting the layout up an running is not cheap but model railroading has a stigma that its far more expensive then its actual cost is for a home layout, revenue for the layout is disposable income. However any modeler worth his salt can find ways to cut corners and that lady in the next room should know about it.  

     

    The end result is a hobby for a lifetime that does not cost golf fees, launch fees, a licence to fly hunt or fish, fuel, tires, batterys and the paint jobs are cheap to do LOL. Its also time consumming and were not in a bar. My son pays 40 a week to golf, I would love to spend 40 a week on my hobby LOL The point I want to make is that it its a relitivly cheap past time now and so much safer then any I can think of. I have a friend thats into RC planes, he has as much investment in them as I do in trains, asked him if he ever flew his new plane, he is hesitent to fly it, needs calm air, and perhaps next summer. We might drop one of our engines but its unlimited on when or how long we run trains, and dont have to belong to a flying club nor the monthley fees.

     

    A few years ago I got so into this hobby it so much it became an obsession, was all I could think of, of course everyone has the passion for it, but this train thing got way, way, beond that. My wife just didnt understand how importent this was to me( thats what I thought at the time), and she was starting to get a bit distant. During a sermon at Church about the golden calf, the idol, it hit me like a ton of bricks and then I really started to look at my obsession in a more realistic manner. This is a hobby and I let it get out of controll, like a gambler or poker player, it became more then a hobby.

     

    I guess the point to the above paragraph is if your in school, the hobby is a fantastic pastime, but not worth getting in the way of an education, concerning the home work. No one is going to pay you more then your worth, all good grades show to a future employer is that you have the ability to learn, and he wont hire a guy with Ds on account of the A student will learn quicker, costing him less to train you... hey thats life

     

    But then its the greatest Hobby in the world

     

    I sincerrly hope I did not offend anyone reading this and that was not my intention, I wanted to do a humorus blog and just spun off on this.

     

     

     

2 comments
  • Rick Phipps likes this
  • Rick Phipps
    Rick Phipps John, a lot of truth there. I have only been in it a year now and I can see myself at times foregoing other things because of my train interests. I guess it's like anything else and can become a "golden calf" so much that we worship in a way and...  more
    November 21, 2011
  • Neal M
    Neal M John and Rick,
    I would like to add my perspective to this conversation/blog.
    As I see the three of us are not youngsters (although I’m told by my wife I can act like one), there are priorities in life that take precedent in what we do. I met my wife in my early 30’s. We talked about our likes, dislikes and where we have common interests. While no marriage is perfect, the key to our successful marriage is ‘compromise’. I give her all the space and freedom she needs, whether it’s to go on a trip with her cousin for 2 weeks, quiet time alone, and, when I can, spoil her with things I know she likes. While we’re not rich, we work, have a good income, and save money for retirement, but never cheap. I am not demanding, the model trains are my vice. She gives me the space I need as I’m self-employed and work over 70 hours a week, sometimes more and at times 7 days a week…
    My wife knew about my hobby since day one, and supports me in what I do. In our 25 years together (dating and marriage), she has been to one train sho...  ...  more
    November 22, 2011